August 9, 2011

giving in and committing

People said the happiest moment you're gonna go through in a relationship is the time when you first get to know each other. The phases afterwards won't be as thrilling as the initial phase, real talk. It's a stupid cycle when you go from friends to close friends to couple and there are fights, unimportant arguments, misunderstandings, and finally the relationship goes boring/flat/annoying/stressing. It's also when you know both of you are not going anywhere but you tried to keep the relationship going til you end up hurting each other. This is so effing common and I hate that fact I go through the same thing again and again. Just when I thought this time is different, problem comes in, those stupid cycle takes place and dang ! there you go, same ending, same story, same heartbreaking decision, just with a different person. Sad? Don't be. Your friends, family, relatives, siblings and people around you are gonna comfort you, "perhaps he's just not the one" "there are a lot of guy out there, better one" "don't be sad, it's not the end of the world". Well, thank you for the fake concerns, I'll do fine.

Now the most ridiculous part ! Despite how many times love fails you, there is always someone who's gonna show up and make your heart falls ten feet out of its place. There will always be one opposite sex who make you go head over heels. Remember the butterflies you feel when he said he kinda adore you? Remember how you blush over his romantic texts? That is how sweet love is, at first. And please believe me, whatever comes up afterwards are those hell you could never imagine.`Even worse, no single couple is gonna escape this, we all go through the same thing, the same complicated process. I swore and promised myself that I'm not gonna see anybody, I'm not gonna date anyone, I'm not gonna involve in any serious relationship for a certain long time, however, turns out I bailed on myself.

Once again, I let this happen. For this time God, just for this time, please go easy on me. You are the only one that can see the hell I've been through. I ain't asking for anything, just bless this one. If I get to choose, I wouldn't want to fall in love for they say "never fall in love; fall off bridge, it hurts less". You send him in, You make me say yes, You gotta protect me, make this a beautiful story I'd share to my kids, thank you.